by Shae on November 27, 2012


I have just finished watching an episode of America In Primetime on SBS about women in television.

One of the directors was talking about how showing these women in their full glory, all their flaws and secrets and unpleasantness, was part of what made people flock to watch.


Because we get it. We relate.


We see these women have moments of hating their lives, their kids, their jobs, their partners. We see them fuck up, do the wrong thing, abuse themselves, hurt people. We see them try and not always succeed.

We see them being less than perfect.


And rather than feel some sort of schadenfreude we breathe a sigh of relief.

We see that nobody’s life is perfect.

And that makes our own imperfections OK.


I had the loveliest evening tonight. Luke and I took the kids to a local pub for dinner and a great time was had by all.  I am truly grateful for our life and the different decisions that we’ve made. I am constantly blown away with how much I enjoy my children and how natural the way I parent feels to me.

But I’ve also had days where I’ve had to go into another room and bite my fist to stop me from screaming because I feel like I’m so trapped by the life we have. I love my kids and husband intensely-but sometimes it’s just so damn HARD. Sometimes I’m tired of being the grown up. Sometimes I wish the kids were at school or daycare or wherever isn’t next to me arguing about whose turn it is on the fucking iPad.


That’s the truth.

But life isn’t 100% good and easy or it’s shit.


There is no such thing as a perfect housewife or working mother or single woman etc etc. The magic “having it all” is not one thing to all people-we’ll all have a different version.

We’re all flawed. We all have struggles


But I kind of think those parts are what makes the good bits great.



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{ 7 comments… read them below or add one }

Caroline November 27, 2012 at 10:16 pm

Love this Shae. I struggle. I’m not a natural parent and I find it hard. I try and focus on how lucky we are. Moving to Australia is part of that x Thanks for sharing :)


Cat November 27, 2012 at 10:21 pm

I may have screamed at my beloved on Sunday, “Do you think I’m enjoying this life?” …. not my proudest moment but also a rare one for me. I struggle with the total lack of “alone-ness” I get at this point but at the same time I love them all dearly and want to be close to them all the time. We are all flawed you’re totally right! We aren’t all categories or stereotypes and I think most of us do our best. You’re so insightful and clever though you know? x


Deb @ Bright and Precious November 27, 2012 at 10:36 pm

Love hearing your thoughts as always, Shae. You’re so inspiring, did you know that?! xx


Maxabella November 27, 2012 at 10:38 pm

And cheers to that, Shae! To life in all its frustratingly awesome crappiness. x


Miss Pink November 28, 2012 at 11:51 am

I have to agree wholeheartedly. I nodded along because I struggle a lot with those people who always preach perfection, especially in the areas I struggle. I try to be happy for them but in the end I wind up resenting them and being annoyed with them. Though I have had a lot of experience with those kind of people not having it as great behind closed doors.
I don’t know, I just like people around me who fuck up and can tell me so I can sigh a breath of relief and admit that yeah I do too.


Carli November 29, 2012 at 1:10 pm

You’re so right, and I think it’s so important not to shut down anyone else’s experience of parenting or life. We should be free to talk about our joys and struggles without judgement.


Dorothy @ Singular Insanity December 2, 2012 at 2:13 pm

What I really love about blogging, or rather personal blogging, is that it’s dominated by women, mothers even, who are not afraid to let it all hang out. To show the ugly, as well as the happy sides of their lives. The mundane and the extraordinary. Because our lives are all of those things.


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